


Jack Barakat &' Alex Gaskarth in: The Boys Boarding School

by HAtxAH



Category: All Time Low (Band)
Genre: Alex has a mental illness, All time low is great, As well as josh and tyler, Drugs, I just love all time low, Jack is a drug addict, M/M, Mental Instability, Not Your Typical Love Story, Rian and Zack are just side characters, Self Harm, alex is openly gay, but he likes emo bands, i dont even now what this is, jack and alex are roommates, jack is the new student, jack was one of the cool kids
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-05-28 10:38:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15047054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HAtxAH/pseuds/HAtxAH
Summary: It was Jack's first day at the boys boarding school. He was sent there by his parents who thought Jack would learn how to behave because Jack was a troublemaker. Most of the times they didn't really punished him for the things he did but when Jack got arrested for trying to break into a guy's room (the guy his ex slept with) they decided to send him to that school in the middle of the school year.And he did learn something new at that school. But it was not about rules and behavior.It was about his sexuality...





	1. first chapter: the arrival

_Wow I already hate this place_ and _How do I survive without girls here?_ were Jacks first thoughts when he got out of the car and glanced at that old building in front of him, where he will live from now on.

 

His mother got out of the car too, to say him goodbye. His father didn't even bother with saying anything, he just nodded with his head and waited until his wife got in the car again so they could finally leave their son.

 

“Oh honey, please don't make a face like that. I know you will be happy here. I love you and you know I only did that for your own good, okay?” His mother hugged him tightly before leaving him.

 

So, there Jack stood, with his belongings, which consisted of two suitcases and a bag, and without a clue where to go.

 

_Ah, I don't care. When these people want me in this school, they need to come outside and get me._

 

With one suitcase as a chair, he sat down, took his pack of cigarettes and a lighter out of his leather jacket and lighted up a cigarette. Before he could take a drag, he heard a person shouting while running towards him.

 

_Oh god, please don't tell me this is a no smoking school._

 

He was right. The person running towards him was the secretary of the school, who waited for him to show him the school.

“Here you are Mr. Barakat, I've waited for you. Oh, and please throw that cigarette away. We don't allow smoking at this school. I need to confiscate the other ones too, please just give them to me and I'll forget about that break of the rules this time.”

 

_Is everybody here like that? So fucking boring. I really hope I'll get a cooler roommate._

 

“Oh, yeah, I didn't know about that rule. Here.” With an eye rolling Jack gave the cigarettes to the secretary and let her lead him through the school to his room.

 

“Here is a key to the room. You will share it with a really nice boy, his name is Alex Gaskarth. I hope you will get along very well. He has classes right now, but he will finish in around three hours.

 

You'll get a little break to get to know this place better, so your classes will start next Monday. When you have any questions, just come to me.”, with that the secretary gave Jack the key and left.

 

Jack opened the door and went into the room. It was smaller than his room at home but it was acceptable. One of the beds was neatly made and a book laid next to the pillow. The other one was not occupied. Jack threw his suitcases next to it and laid down on his bed.

 

_Fuck, I really have no chance in escaping this place. It's too far from home and I don't know where the next city is. So I guess I just need to deal with it. They'll realize they don't want to have me here. In a short time I'll be home again._

 

With these thoughts he began to unpack his things. His clothes, which were mostly black and from bands he liked, in the little wardrobe next to his bed and the stuff he doesn't want people to find into a big bag. Then he pushed his suitcases and the bag under the bed and laid down on it again, this time with his smartphone in his right and headphones in his left hand.

 

By the time Alex finished his classes and got back to his room, Jack was already asleep with his headphones on and _Pierce The Veil_ blasting so loud that even Alex could hear it when he opened the door.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like the first chapter of my first jalex fanfic. Please tell me if you liked it and if you have anything to correct :)
> 
> also please don't forget to give this story a kudos


	2. second chapter: the roommate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex got back to his room and fell in love at first sight with the unknown boy who turns out to be his new roommate.

Jack woke up when suddenly his music stopped. He opened his eyes and stared in other ones. Because of the sudden appearance of a unknown face in front of him, Jack startled and made a really inhuman noise while jumping slightly and hitting the back of his head at the wall next to his bed.

 

The unknown person began to laugh before asking: “Hey, are you okay? I'm sorry; I didn't want to scare you, I just didn't know how to wake you up. I'm Alex by the way. You must be my new roommate. Nice to meet you.”

 

Jack nodded to let him know that he was okay before taking Alex' reached out hand and shaking it with a simple “Jack.”

 

Alex smiled and gave Jack his headphones back that he took away before to wake him up.

 

“Sooo, normally we have to be downstairs in ten minutes so we get the good food and not the leftovers, but because I'm friends with the principal, I got some food for you and me and I was even allowed to take it upstairs. I thought that might be better for you because it's your first day and yeah. Sorry, I know I talk way too much.” Alex smiled even wider and took the two trays with food and sat down on Jack's bed.

 

“Yeah, no that's okay. I'm fine when people talk much. And thank you for getting me some food, I'm starving,” Jack said before taking one of the trays and the two began to eat.

 

Some time Jack or Alex looked up at the other one and when they both did it at the same time they laughed. It was a great atmosphere and Jack really enjoyed the presence of Alex.

 

When Alex finished he began to ask Jack a bunch of questions, like his favorite food ( _of course spaghetti_ ), his favorite color ( _green_ ) and his favorite band ( _a very hard question to answer but at the moment it was sleeping with sirens_ ). Then the question jack has been waiting to be asked: “So, I don't know if it's too personal, but why are you here?”

 

Jack grinned and answered: “Well it was probably because my parents were afraid that I'll be a father of multiple children with 18 because I just had way to much sex with everyone. Like for real I just went to every party and hooked up with anyone who wanted to, you know? And I may or may not broke into the house of a dude because he fucked my ex girlfriend. So yeah, I'm a real bad boy, you think you can handle me?”

 

Alex laughed before nodding. “Yeah I think we'll get along pretty well. Do you smoke by the way? Sounds like a creep but you smell like it.”

 

“Yes I do. That bitch of a secretary confiscated my pack of camels and my favorite lighter.” Jake made a sad face.

 

“Do you have another pack? I can try to get your lighter but I don't have any cigarettes and I had my last one in years. I really crave one right now.”

 

Jack nodded. “Well, when you bring me my lighter we can share.”

 

“Yes, you're my lifesaver right now. Thank you soo much. I'll go and get it, I'm back in like five minutes.” With that Alex jumped out of bed and ran out of the room, making little jumps in the air.

 

Jack just laughed at the childish behavior.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please leave a kudos  
> and a comment if you have something to correct or to tell me if you liked the chapter :)


	3. third chapter: light my cigarette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Jack get to know each other better.

Jack finished his meal and then laid down on his bed again with his headphones in his ears.

 

Alex needed longer than he thought for convincing the principal to give him Jack's lighter. After fake crying a little bit and saying Jack will only like him if he gets him his lighter back the principal finally gave in.

 

Then Alex had to go to the school nurse to get his daily medicine.

 

He finally got back to their room after 15 minutes to find Jack laying on his bed with his music on very loud while he just stared at the ceiling. Something was off.

 

Alex decided not to ask and just threw Jack's lighter on his bed while sitting down on his own.

 

Jack startled before taking his headphones out and throwing a little smile to Alex.

 

While Jack got his bag from under his bed, Alex quickly took his medicine with a little sip of water so Jack couldn't see what he did. He didn't want Jack to know about his illness. Not yet.

 

Jack came back out from under his bed with a big triumphant smile and his bag in his hands. He opened it and took out one pack of cigarettes. Before he could close the bag again Alex saw two little doses with pills and a small dark bag while the smell of weed hit him.

 

_Okay, so he is a drug addict. I can live with that._ Alex thought while smiling and pretending that he didn't see anything.

 

Jack hold three cigarettes up and grinned. “Can we smoke somewhere without getting caught?”

 

Alex, who felt the medicine doing its magic; calmed down a bit and without saying anything he just stood up and stretched his hand out for Jack to take it. 

 

It was a few minutes after 10pm which meant that there weren't any students allowed on the halls. Luckily nobody caught Alex and Jack while they were tiptoeing outside. There was a forest behind the school where Alex usually went to relax and just enjoyed the silence.

 

A few minutes into the forest was a river with an old stone bridge. Alex sat down on it and let his feet dangling off the edge. Jack sat down next to him. Then they realized they were holding hands the whole time. Alex blushed and pulled his hand away quickly while Jack began to apologize that he didn't realized it sooner. Suddenly they both stopped with their rambling and just looked at each other. Then they burst out laughing. 

 

Alex laid down and enjoyed the silence, just like he always did when he was here.

 

Jack watched him, how his eyes closed slowly and his breath became even. He smiled slightly. Seeing Alex smile so carefree Jack just had to smile too. 

 

He then got out his cigarette and lit it.

 

Alex eyes shot open when he heard the  _click_ of the lighter and he sat up again.

 

Jack took his first drag of his cigarette. He felt the smoke deep in his lunges and how the cold in his body made place for the warmth of the smoke. He breathed out loudly and relaxed.

 

Then he gave the cigarette to Alex, who accepted it gladly and also took a deep drag.

 

It felt awesome to feel the cigarette between his fingers and the smoke spreading out in his mouth and lungs again after such a long time. 

 

They passed the cigarettes to each other until the first two were done. 

 

Alex got back to his previous position and Jack copied him laying down next to him.

 

They laid there and talked half the night about god and the world. Before they decided to go back Jack quickly smoked the third cigarette alone saying he always needed two when he smoked.

The walk back to the school was quiet. Both Alex and Jack thought about taking the others hand again just for the feeling of not being alone, but not one of them was brave enough.

 

It was early in the morning when they finally arrived back in their room. They quickly brushed their teeth and changed before falling into their beds. But none of them could fall asleep just yet. They both laid there in the dark, reviewing the evening and smiling, because they were both just content.

 

Jack got the feeling of not wanting to go back home this night.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can any of you guess the illness Alex has?
> 
> Did you like the chapter? Please let me know in the comments :)
> 
> Don't forget to give a kudos <3


	4. forth chapter: the kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okay so I dont have any ideas what to write. and idk this is trash. im sorry

 

 

The weekend passed fast for Jack. He and Alex spend the whole time alone outside in the forest and they learned so many things about each other. Jack showed Alex some of his favorite songs and Alex really liked them. He told Jack that his mother never let him listen to music that was a little darker, though he didn't tell him why she forbid it.

 

Alex enjoyed being rebellious. While being with Jack everything was fine and he felt awesome.

 

Jack really liked the childlike side of Alex, how he was so carefree and happy about every little thing.

Alex didn't have to hide or control himself around Jack, so he decided that his medicine, that made him calm down, was not necessary anymore.

 

In the night of Sunday to Monday, Jack's first day in his new school, they were at the bridge again. It became their little secret place.

 

Jack didn't care that it was so late, he didn't need much sleep, five to six hours were enough for him.

Alex on the other hand really needed around eight hours of sleep to function normally.

 

The nights with Jack made him really happy but he had no energy left because of his lack of sleep. So when they layed there next to each other, their arms touching and the warmth of the other's body making the cold of the night disappear, Alex fell asleep.

 

The problem with Alex's sleep was that when he slept, nothing could wake him up. Not even an earthquake.

Jack noticed that Alex was sleeping when he sat up because it was getting cold. He tried to wake him up, but no matter how hard he shakes him, Alex just murmured something like _five more minutes_ before going back to sleep.

 

So, without thinking about it too long, Jack lifted Alex up and carried him the whole way back to the school building.

 

Luckily he didn't get caught because that would be bad.

He, the new student, carrying the nice boy, that was friends with the principal, around after the curfew while Alex looked like he passed out.

 

Without any problems or interruptions he arrived their room.

When he let Alex down on his bed carefully he couldn't resist the urge anymore and pressed his own lips on Alex's.

It wasn't even a second long but Jack felt really bad when he pulled back.

 

Maybe he stole Alex's first kiss without his agreement.

 

Maybe Alex wouldn't even wanted that.

 

Maybe now after he felt the soft and sweet lips of Alex on his own he won't be able to think of anything else.

 

Maybe he fell in love with Alex Gaskarth, who probably was very straight and would hate Jack if he ever found out.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know it's short and nothing happens. urgh Im so unhappy with this chapter and the whole story. idk how to continue.


	5. fifth chapter: it's actually pretty easy being nice to a bitter boy like him

The first day Jack had to go to his classes and he was already late. He and Alex joked around the next morning and they didn't notice they should have been in their classrooms ten minutes ago. Luckily they both didn't get punished because Alex was loved by every teacher and Jack was a new student.

 

Jack's first class was biology, which was one of his favorite classes. He was actually pretty good at it.

 

After the biology class he had mathematics with Alex. They sat together in the back of the room and talked most of the time.

 

Jack just couldn't look away. Alex was so beautiful and sweet and Jack just couldn't understand how he had no girlfriend.

 

“Why are you staring like that? Do I have something in my face?”, Alex asked.

 

Jack quickly looked away. “No, I just looked around, I didn't stare.”

 

“Hey, relax, I was just joking. I don't mind if you stare.” Alex grinned before turning back to look at the board.

Jack really didn't understand the feelings he fely for this guy next to him. He wasn't even gay. But Alex was just too sweet. He was like a drug for Jack and he was too deep into the addiction.

 

Jack wished the morning would pass by quicker, he couldn't stand being quiet, he needed to go out in the forest again with Alex and a few cigarettes.

 

“Ay, Lex, do you think we could skip? I really need a cigarette right now”, Jack whispered.

 

Alex turned to him before answering: “Yeah, you can skip the next lesson, I've got your back.”

 

“That's sweet but I want you to come with me. I don't like being alone. Please.”

 

Alex couldn't say no to Jack pleading with his puppy eyes. He nodded and Jack grinned happily.

 

After the bell rang, Jack ran back to his room and got his cigarettes before going to the edge of the woods, where Alex waited for him. Jack hugged him quickly and strong, before taking his hand and pulling him to the bridge.

 

They stayed the whole day there, cuddling and smoking. Well, Alex just smoked one or two, Jack smoked a whole lot more. He didn't have any cigarettes anymore, so he decided to go back to school. Luckily Alex knew someone who sold cigarettes, and other stuff, so they went to the guy's room and knocked.

 

A big boy with a nose piercing opened the door.

 

“What do you want?”

 

Before Jack or Alex could answer, another boy appeared behind the first one.

 

“Who is there? Oh, hey Alex, nice seeing you again. How are you. Come on Zack, let them in.”

 

The pierced guy opened the door wider and let Alex and Jack in.

 

“So, who's that friend of yours Alex?”, the second boy asked.

 

“Oh yeah, sorry I forgot to introduce you three.”, Alex answered.

 

“So this is Jack, my new roommate”, he said while pointing at Jack.

 

“These two are the guys I told you about, Zack and Rian”, Alex pointed at the pierced guy and then at the other one.

 

“Nice to meet you”, Jack said shyly, Zack and Rian smiled at him and repeated what he just said.

 

 

“Soo, what are you doing here?”, Rian asked while looking at Alex.

 

Alex grinned. “I found you a new costumer. Jack here needs cigarettes. You do have some, haven't you?”

 

Zack nodded and went to the bathroom. Seconds later he came out with a plastic bag with cigarettes and joints in it.

 

“How many do you want?”, he asked Jack.

 

Jack got his money out and counted it. “Well, I have twenty, how many do I get for that?”

 

“Well, you probably know how hard it is to get some, so I can only give you one pack for fifteen.”

 

Jack nodded and gave Zack the money, while Zack got out one pack and gave it to Jack.

 

They stayed a little bit, talking about this and that.

 

Shortly before they left, Zack pulled Jack to the side.

 

“So I know that you feel something for Alex, I can see that. Don't even try to deny it.”

 

Jack just looked at him, scared that he will tell Alex.

 

“I don't want to tell him, I wanted to tell you something. You have to be careful around him. Alex has an illness. I will not tell you what it is, that is his job. But please, take care of him. He likes you too, I can sense that. And when he needs you, please be there for him. If you hurt him, I'll hurt you too.”

 

Jack just laughed, because he was afraid of Zack and because he thought it was some crazy joke.

 

But he couldn't stop thinking about it.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, so I know it took me a little while to upload a new chapter but it has been a rough month and I relapsed.  
> But I feel better now so here's the new chapter. 
> 
> Please tell me if you liked it. And don't forget to give a kudos. I'm really happy about all the comments. Thank you guys.


	6. sixth chapter: you said you needed space, I got a couple scars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I decided to delete the scene were Zack tells Jack about Alex's kink. Not because I am uncomfortable about writing smut but because I think it doesn't fit in this fanfic. Maybe I'll use it in another fanfic later.

Sometimes when Alex had more classes than Jack and came back to their room later, the room would smell like weed and Jack would lie in his bed with loud and sad music on, staring at the ceiling and doing nothing.

 

When Jack was high he became calmer but he also thought more about his life and death and yes, he became depressed.

 

When this happened, Alex would just lay down next to Jack and cuddle with him, not saying anything. Jack wouldn't say anything either but he really enjoyed Alex's companionship.

 

Alex was always there for Jack when he needed him.

 

But then the time came where Alex needed Jack.

 

Alex knew it was going to happen. He was way too happy for way too long (which maybe was because of Jack).

 

Then, one morning, when Alex woke up after a night full of nightmares, he felt it. The numbness was back, together with the voices.

 

_**Hello Lexy, nice to finally meet you again. It's good that you stopped taking the meds.** _

 

Alex wanted to die.

 

_**Oh yes, we know but you can't die. Not yet. We want to play with you a little longer, alright?** _

 

The voices normally were just a light whisper but because Alex didn't take his medicine for almost two weeks, they were too strong and too loud and Alex just couldn't take it.

 

He felt a bad headache creeping up.

 

Deciding that we'll skip classes today, he just turned around and pulled the blanket over his head.

But he forgot about Jack, who just finished his morning routine and now happily jumped onto Alex's bed to wake him up.

 

“Hey Lexy, wake up. Our classes start in like ten minutes. We have to hurry.”

 

_**Oh, he calls you Lexy too? How sweet. He seems to like you, though we don't understand why he should like someone as ugly and fat and dumb as you.** _

 

The worst part about the voices was, that they sounded like the people who were most important to Alex.

Mostly they sounded like his grandmother or his sister, but sometimes they sounded like Rian and Zach, because they were his only friends.

 

But this time they sounded like Jack, who was now sitting on top of Alex, punching him lightly to wake him up.

 

“I am awake Jack. Please get off of me.” Alex said quietly.

 

Jack got up and sat down next to Alex. “Hey Lex, what's wrong? You don't sound so good.”

 

“Yeah, I don't feel good either. I think I'll stay in bed today, could you tell the teacher?”

 

“Oh, yes of course. I'll go now, I hope you get better soon”, Jack answered before pressing a light kiss on Alex forehead. Then he left the room quietly.

 

When the door was closed, Alex stood up immediately and rushed to the bathroom, where he locked himself in.

 

He felt so bad for lying at Jack.

 

He felt the urge to throw up but he didn't eat anything other than breakfast yesterday so nothing came out.

 

Alex felt miserable.

 

Quickly he stood up and opened the cupboard that was hanging over the sink.

 

He took a razor out and broke it open so he could take out the blades.

 

Without any emotions he sat back on the cold floor and began to push the cold metal into his arm, leaving deep cuts.

 

The pain and the sight of his blood helped to shut the voices for a short time.

 

But it wasn't enough.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading, please tell me if you liked it. don't forget to leave a kudos and maybe leave ideas for following chapters? I have writer's blocks all the time xD


	7. seventh chapter: you're the one habit I just can't quit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex almost kills himself because of his voices while Jack sits in class and misses him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry that it took me so long to continue this story, I tried to kill myself a few weeks ago but as you can see it didn't work so here I am. Also please ignore all the mistakes I'll make during this chapter, I don't have my laptop with me and my smartphone doesn't have autocorrect :)

Blood everywhere.

 

Alex was sitting on the bathroom floor. He didn't remember how he got there. 

 Then the pain kicked in. His whole arm hurt like it was on fire.

 

Then his vision finally focused on his arm and he saw the blood.

 

The skin on his right arm wasn't there anymore, everything was slashed open and there was still fresh blood spilling out of the wounds.

 

Alex almost blacked out again because of the sight but he resisted it and quickly got up to get the first aid kit.

 

His vision blurred a little bit because he got up so fast but he managed to stand and pull the kit out of the cupboard over the sink. 

 

He didn't know how he should stop the blood flow so he just sprayed desinfection spray on his whole arm and put the bandages around it.

 

Then he stumbled to his bed and fell asleep almost immediately.

 

 

Jack didn't enjoy the classes without Alex next to him. It was boring and he actually had to listen to the teachers.

 

But he managed to stay awake (for most of the time).

 

The only classes he enjoyed were his music classes because the teacher liked him and he could show off with his guitar skills.

But it still wasn't the same without Alex smiling at him when one of his guitar solos was especially good.

 

The whole day his thoughts always were on the boy, if he felt any better and what he did right now.

Jack couldn't deny it, he was feeling something for Alex. He wasn't sure what it was but when he was with him, he felt so relaxed and safe, something normally only drugs could give him.

 

Finally his school day ended and he could go back to Alex. 

But before he went to the principal to let him know, that Alex was sick and to ask if they could take some food to their room. 

The principal luckily allowed Jack to get some food and with some actually good looking burgers he made his way to their room.

 

As quit as he could, Jack entered the door, trying not to wake Alex up if he slept. 

 

And he was right, Alex was lying on his bed, eyes closed and chest rising and sinking regularly.

 

Jack quickly put the burgers down on a table and went to the bathroom because he drank so much water this day.

 

When he opened the door, he almost screamed. It looked like a crime scene.

 

Blood everywhere.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, please leave a comment they always make me so happy 
> 
> ily guys <3


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